I have never had so many requests to blog about a story. Alright perverts, let's talk about "sexpresso."

The Seattle Times reports a number of racy coffee stands attracting attention for their attractive, scantily-clothed female employees. At Cowgirls Espresso in Tukwila, Bikini Espresso in Renton, Natte Latte in Port Orchard, Moka Girls Espresso in Auburn, Café Lorraine in Woodinville, The Sweet Spot in Shoreline and Best Friend Espresso in Kenmore baristas are increasing traffic at their respective locations by wearing bikini tops, lingerie, thigh-highs or even fetish ensembles.

The Times narrates: In a short, sheer, baby-doll negligee and coordinated pink panties, Candice Law is dressed to work at a drive-through espresso stand in Tukwila, and she is working it.

Customers pull their trucks up to the window, where Law greets each with an affectionate nickname, blows kisses, and vamps about as she steams milk for a mocha. "You want whipped cream?" she asks, a sly smile playing on her pierced lip.

The next customer rolls up, and Law throws a long leg onto the window sill, like an indie-rock ballerina at the barre.

"Do you like my leg warmers?" she asks. "Aren't they hot?"

These baristas do leave something for the imagination. Cowgirls Espresso owner Lori Bowden says "law requires that employees cover their breasts and buttocks, so there will be no 'thong Thursday,' as some customers have requested." Bummer.

It's not just the customers who are looking to innovate the dress code. "I like the idea of Saran Wrap Saturday," says Law, a barista at Cowgirls Espresso. "Now they've got those colored Saran Wraps. Dude, they could totally make a cute outfit."

I spoke to Café Fiore manager Katrine Callahan about this phenomenon. Café Fiore has locations in Ballard and Queen Anne and provides coffee in a traditional, clothed atmosphere. Here's the interview:

WIB: "So would you ever consider enforcing this dress code at your locations?"
KC: "Um, I don't think so."
WIB: "Well how about --"
KC: "No."
WIB: "What if --"
KC: "No."

Callahan did say that she was consulted by a local entrepreneur about a new sexpresso stand he is intending to open in North Seattle on Aurora (go figure).

Courtney, one of the many who emailed me this story, said she's concerned that she'll be hearing a lot of "Paolo and I are going to get coffee" kind of statements from Scott in the near future. She's got a point. "Going for coffee" has certainly gained a new connotation.

Now go take a cold shower.

Mondays are tough. Mondays in the middle of winter are even tougher. And today so many factors are working against us that a British psychologist is calling this day, January 22, the Unhappiest Day of the Year.

According to a CBS report, this proclamation is based on the psychologist Cliff Arnall's mathematical equation, which "takes into account six factors: bad weather, unpaid Christmas bills, post-Christmas fatigue, failed New Years resolutions, low motivation levels and the feeling of a need to take action. Taken together, they calculate to equal 'Blue Monday.'"

I'd like to add minimal daylight, day of the workweek and the U.S.-specific tax time to that equation.

Thanks to Anna (who claims today is one of the warmest, sunniest days of the season yet in Bend, Ore.) for flagging this story to me.

The Strip Mall Mecca (aka Federal Way) is heating up in a debate over whether Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth" should be shown in schools. The school board placed a moratorium on the film while it investigates whether a screening adheres to district policies.

The film was scheduled to play in a science class at Federal Way's Lakota Middle School until parent Frosty Hardison found out. He filed a formal complaint Jan. 11, spawning a national debate about the legitimacy of the global warming theory and fueling Daily Show clips.

"It's not that we don't believe global warming is happening. It says so in Revelations," said Hardison. "We've been expecting it for what, 3,500 years now?"

Frosty is a father of seven. He opposes sex education and supports public school teaching of creationism. He's described earth as a rather pubescent 14,000-year-old planet.

"Condoms don't belong in school, and neither does Al Gore. He's not a schoolteacher," he said. I'll refrain from comparing Al Gore to a condom because he's safe and diminishes sensation.

The Federal Way School Board is scheduled to meet tomorrow to discuss the issue. The movie could be shown in a classroom if the superintendent decides a screening is in line with district policy.

I picked today's Seattle Times and read the headline: "Sonics want $300 million; some legislators roll eyes." This was not the kind of news I wanted to see on the day I'm going to a Sonics game -- the first time in a decade. I'm already only lukewarm to the Sonics since they traded Gary Payton. That was a personal foul.

I could never justify the cost of buying a ticket, so I lucked out when Wes scored a few tickets from a co-worker.

Sonics attendance has been low. It's the result of high ticket prices, an unsuccessful team and the Sonics' persistance that they need taxpayers to fund an improved Key Arena or an altogether new stadium in Renton or Bellevue. And the team is taking another shot for money.

The Times reports, "Sonics owner Clay Bennett wants at least $300 million in taxpayer money to help pay for a new arena that could cost as much as $530 million, but the request already has drawn skepticism from some key state lawmakers."

If history repeats itself, the Sonics' newest attempt will fail. That'll put them at what? 0-4? That's a poor field goal percentage. I think it's time for the Sonics to work on their game and show that they deserve a new stadium rather than just ask for playing time. Sick burn. And 1.

We've got our first headlining Seattle show tonight. Woo hoo!

Update: Thanks to all of you who came out last night, including the couple dozen of you who drove up from Tacoma and the group from Portland. It was a great turnout. We rocked that place.