Dear Eliza, 59 Months Old

We’ve been on the move.

We’re escaping the constraints of COVID-19. Escaping the usual surroundings. Escaping the smoke.

Thanks to the Chaffee family, we’ve been able to get in some rotations on the peninsula. A couple weeks ago, we hit the road for a weeklong family vacation in eastern Washington. We were supposed to be in Italy most of last month. Eastern Washington was sort of a consolation that delivered on the heat and wine, but not quite the beaches, food or culture.

The trip was really good for all of us. We nailed the Airbnb choices, staying at a small farm and a winery to split the week. You and Matteo loved the farm life. We stayed in a converted pull barn and had a horsepen across the driveway. You two ran around saying hi to the horses, goats, pigs and stray cat. The property also included a large pool that we had to ourselves. You jumped off a diving board for the first time and with major confidence, quickly progressing to canonballs and aerial spins. You also got more comfortable without a life jacket on the shallow end and could swim the width of the pool without assistance.

The winery was less entertaining for you than it was us. The condo was super spacious, and we bought some toys and puzzles to keep you busy. We turned down the heat in the hot tub and got in there a couple times each day. We drove into Yakima to grab some baked goods and got on the Yakima River one day. In the evening we turned on the TV as babysitter for you and Matteo and walked across the driveway to the Freehand Cellars tasting room to enjoy a bottle of wine.

On our way back home, we drove alongside Mt. Rainier National Park and stopped at Rimrock Lake for one more dip in a natural pool. Well, I swam while you and Matteo caught frogs on the shoreline.

We escaped home again this past weekend because the air quality was so bad, and continues to be. There are wildfires up and down the West. We’re lucky to just be dealing with bad air while others are being evacuated from their homes or have lost them entirely. Still, we didn’t want to be stuck inside so, on a whim, drove up to Bellingham to crash with your cousins. That was a primo decision as you got along so well with Harry and Winnie, and your Mom and I got another break to have some time with your Aunt Nina and Uncle Jeff.

We’ve been on the move a lot and I think that’s in our family’s nature. We can’t sit still for too long. I can’t explain why. It’s an energy thing. Your Mom and I get energy from going different places and interacting with different people. You’re along for the ride and don’t know any different. Thanks for hanging with all the twists and turns of the year. 2020 has been scary, hectic and is now literally on fire. We’ll get through it. And if we get into a tough spot, we’ll keep on the move — and always moving forward.

Love, Dad

Dear Matteo, 38 Months Old

You have a song in your heart.

When left on your own to play or read, you often hum a tune or sing a hook out loud. Your song choices are show jingles like PJMasks and Paw Patrol or the newest Taylor Swift song. Sometimes you get into a rock mood and will sing the few mumbled words you know from the Bruce Springsteen songs your Mom plays in the kitchen. This all started months ago when you’d lay in bed at night and try dinnertime prayers or other phrases you heard throughout the day aloud.

I’m amazed at your natural inclination to recite and repeat as a way of learning. It really works for you.

We always know when you’re in the music zone. EIther you don’t understand how loud you are or don’t care because you sing like no one’s watching, even when you know they are. I can’t say you have any sense of pitch because your voice is monotone, the equvalent of a toddler barotone, and focused more on the timing and words, less the melody. I never got past that stage myself.

I hesitate to say you come from a musical family. I played in garage bands, not singing, and your Mom can definitely hold a tune but never played an instrument. We have some cousins who have had real talent and aspirations. Maybe you’ll have the generational breakthrough.

You’re also working on your stage performance. Eliza loves to dance and really shakes it out. You follow her lead and more recently have been willing to dance on your own. You have a “macho” approach to dance, scruffing your face with clenched fists like you’re going to pick a fight but twisting and wriggling to the music. You’ll break out the air guitar, which you compact like an air violin, when you hear the guitar solos. It’s very Wayne’s World and you’ll understand that dated SNL reference many years from now.

Keep that song in your heart. Music has helped me process good and tough times. Music has helped me and connect with people, when I’ve been on stage and in the crowd. People are always looking to follow the music. It just takes someone to drop the beat to get the party started. It’s your turn.

Love, Dad

Dear Eliza, 58 Months Old

You have turned into a gigantic bookworm. We’re blazing through the Magic Treehouse book series. At their early-reader font size and page length, we can get through about a book a day. Thank God there are dozens of them and other “chapter books” series to explore after that.

I can’t say I’ve been a prolific or consistent reader, and I usually prefer articles and magazines over books. You must have rubbed off on me because I am reading novels again and think I’m sleeping better because of it — reading your books and then mine before dozing off. Thanks for the nudge there.

Reading is incredibly important for many reasons but most important to me is how much knowledge I can extract from smart people who share their imagination (fiction) and wisdom (non-fiction) much faster than just about any other way to go about it — classrooms, networking, even podcasts.

We’ve recently found a new way to intersect your imagination with your passion for art: Eliza’s Art Shop. It’s a new game where I pretend to be on the computer and check your shop email. I’m your admin. I read aloud all the requests from friends and family for art orders: a picture of Lake Chelan for Grandma Vicki, a Tacoma Hat for Popa Roger, a fairy butterfly for Nonno, etc. You let me know how much each request costs and we exchange imaginary money for your toy cash register. I do not have permission to run the register for Eliza’s Art Shop yet but somehow I have all of the money from the people who emailed. You also have a very elastic price range between $3-$11. After receiving orders and exchanging money, you head toward your art area to fulfill the orders you’ve memorized. Sometime within an hour you reemerge with all the art to spec, hand it to me and ask if we’ve gotten any new email.

I am impressed by your work ethic, sense of economics and product order memorization. You also have a way of formalizing the inflections in your work voice that signals professionalism. I wouldn’t at all be surprised to see Eliza’s Art Shop flourish under your direction, and I’m a proud first employee. Between all of this reading and entrepreneurial endeavor, we’re both thinking big.

Love always,
Dad

Dear Matteo, 37 Months Old

We’re local tourists this summer. Take that, COVID-19. You can take away our big international trips but you can’t keep us home.

Our summer getaway strategy has been housesitting while other people are doing their own travel. We’ve rotated between your Uncle Jeff’s parent’s house, Jim and Cassandra’s beach house, the Broili house and Aunt Nina and Uncle Jeff’s house this past month. That has put us in La Conner, Key Center, (deeper) North Tacoma and Bellingham. It’s been awesome to base out of these different places for local adventures.

The major through line at all of these places has been water. You’ve gotten a ton of swim time at lakes, in the Puget Sound and of course in our oversized patio pool on the weekdays in between. It’s important to get comfortable in water and eventually without a life jacket. There are a lot of water activities to enjoy, but you can’t sink.

All of this water time has really inspired your Mom and I to look at more lake access places and even the idea of owning our own lake house one day. Fresh water is hard to come by in this region of the country, but it’s possible. We’re not opposed to being on the Sound as an alternative. You, reading this in the future, can tell me if we had any success. Mark this letter as the moment we got somewhat serious about trying.

Your Mom and I have made ourselves famous among our friends and family for always teasing a real estate idea but of course never really acting on it. Our version of crying wolf is crying Redfin. The real challenge we have is focus on what we want. Being opportunistic is great and all, but focus is what drives decisions. I think you’ll find that to be true in most aspects of life: education, career, love, real estate. You keeping swimming, we’ll keep house hunting and let’s see where we all get.

Love, Dad

Dear Eliza, 57 Months Old

Summer is in full effect and you’re getting so much beach time! Last weekend we met up with the Ballews and crashed at Uncle Jeff’s parents house in La Conner. We shared the house with your cousins one night and had the second night to ourselves. During COVID it’s hard to “get away” anywhere far or responsibly but that was a nice change of scenery for all of us. The house was right across from the beach and you and Matteo had plenty of time to build forts and play in the rocks. I hear they have sand in California, but really, who can beat rocks?

You also found some courage hunting for crabs with Matteo. He has no hesitation grabbing any size of crab he uncovers but you, like me, are cautious. You found some fearlessness and started picking up crabs, squealing “I’m not scared anymore” through a huge grin. We both laughed. I still didn’t pick up any crabs.

Courage is an especially important trait to lean into. 

Courage is going to be picking up more animals with sharp claws. Courage is going to be making new friends and going to new schools. Courage is understanding people and perspectives you’re unfamiliar with. Courage is going to be putting yourself out there. 

You’re so good at expressing yourself through art and already. The other day you made a “snowball machine” that you said you’d use to make money so I don’t have to work. I like your line of thinking and will continue to encourage you to find ways to support me financially.

Another point of courage will be taking critique and criticism. When you put yourself out there, you’ll get your fair share of it. In the enshrined words of Chris Cornell: “Be yourself is all that you can do.” Believe me, that will always be enough!

Love, Dad