This Easter I'm working, from 7 a.m. to 8 p.m. to be exact. It's my own fault. I need to gain some vacation days. You may all feel bad for me at this time and can call me if you're bored because business is slow as molasses. Grant it, people should be spending time with their families today, not writing 300-word press releases about their start-up businesses.
Congratulations to all of you who made it through Lent without whatever vice you gave up. I don't know if Jesus died for this particular aspect of Easter, but kudos to all of you who played the game anyway. You may now proceed to eat chocolate, drink Diet Coke, resume swearing, etc.
Happy Easter everyone!