FAIL: I Lost My Wedding Ring Snorkeling in Maui

On our tropical vacation, I managed to make the most cliché mistake ever -- losing my wedding ring while snorkeling. I'm not as upset as I am surprised I let that happen. While Amanda and I were walking down to the beach to go snorkeling, I commented that I should have left it back up at the condo. We shrugged it off. It didn't take more than two minutes in the water before I realized the ring was no longer on my finger.

There are three likely fates for the ring:

1. It's lost forever and belongs now to the sea, like Captain Jack Sparrow.

2. Some creepy guy with a metal detector finds it when the tide is low within the next three months. The ring is then promptly sold to a pawn shop for $50. A local 17-year-old girl buys the ring for $90 for her boyfriend to celebrate their first anniversary. Two months later, they break up and the boyfriend throws the ring back out into the sea out of anger and resentment. Repeat.

3. In some distant future, after earth has been abandoned and the oceans have evaporated, a humanoid finds the ring on an exploratory mission for remaining signs of life. The ring is appraised for three times its original value on a syndicated entertainment show called "Pawn Stars," as predicted by Jimmy Hickey.

So anyway, I'll probably pick up a couple inexpensive, ceramic rings to replace it. You can get some great deals for them on eBay.

In all seriousness (though I am seriously replacing it via eBay), I am super bummed not to have my ring. It is just a plain white-gold band, not of any significant monetary value and about as common as a white guy winning American Idol, but it was important to me.

When we were still in the water, I apologized profusely to Amanda.

Without much emotion she replied, "The ring isn't sentimental. The marriage is." She dunked back into the water and continued exploring the seabed.

And with that wisdom, I followed her lead.