Did I not ask you people if anything major happened while I was in Italy? Did I not?

All of you failed to tell me that Jenna Fischer (of 'The Office') is back on the market. After all I do for you people -- providing mostly pointless news and personal tidbits... And no one can tell me that my TV crush is single? What a slap in the face. I'd really be angry if it wasn't for this being such good news and Jenna's radiant beauty.

Like Picasso had his blue phase, I'm in my blonde phase right now, but Jenna, I'll make an exception for you. You know how to contact me on MySpace.