Watch out Jenni Hogan, there's a new traffic girl in town

When spending two to three hours a day commuting with your spouse, you can learn in months what takes most people years! For example, I learned that Amanda should have been a traffic reporter, like KIRO's Jenni Hogan, but without the Aussie accent.

Whether she's the driver or passenger, Amanda calls out traffic reports in real-time. She's not looking at Google Maps or another mobile application to tell me what we can expect. No, she reports exactly what's in front of us.

When traffic is light, she'll report it: "Not too much traffic today. Traffic is usually light on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but Wednesdays and Fridays are just horrible."

When traffic is heavy, she'll report it and with reason: "Look at all of these people! Where are they going? I think there's a dentist convention downtown, so these must all be dentists."

She'll weave in how weather is impacting traffic ("It's a little foggy today, so people should really slow down") and she'll make conversation around unremarkable traffic ("We're moving fast today because it's not Friday"). All that's missing is a pitch to the weather guy ("Back to you, Greg!").

When I'm driving, she describes traffic like I'm blind: "There are break lights in front of you, lots of breaking going on... Someone is going to switch lanes in front of us now."

Her favorite lines are "Holy Jumanji" or "Oh my Jumanji." Anything Jumanji-related substitutes for cussing. I don't know what that tells us about her feelings toward the movie or Robin Williams.

Heaven forbid she sees a motorcycle. Whenever she sees one, she expresses her worry for the rider's safety. She watches the motorcyclist like a hawk and comments on if he's switching lanes, if she thinks other cars see him and if she'd like to give him a hug or not.

Much like how people show different sides of their personalities in the workplace versus at parties, so do they show unique personality flavors while driving. Hence, road rage. Well Amanda has shown a sort of manic, obsessive personality when she's in the car.

It's the price I pay for use of the HOV lane, right?